Life in HD Colour.

One of the challenges I've been facing these days is facing the silence.
Being completely alone.

When I get back from the hustle and bustle of city, after having been practically pulverized by noisy little children at school the whole day, I often unconsciously seek to fill the silence.
I turn the TV on, or put on some music... watch a movie.
Anything to fend off those feelings of being alone.

But when I notice what I'm doing, I consciously turn up the silence.
I mean, what's so bad about it, really?

Most people are afraid to be alone.
Completely and utterly alone.

And no one gets that more than a lonely expat living by themselves in a foreign country.

But what's even more scary is feeling alone in a crowd.

Funnily enough, I haven't felt like that in a long time.
I guess His presence has been so big in my life lately, that anytime the silence threatens to close in on me, I instinctively reach out for Him.
And sigh a huge sigh of relief.

I can't imagine having to face the emptiness without Him.
He puts meaning into the most of mundane tasks.
Purpose in tribulation.
Colour in life.


Without Him , my life would be in black and white.
Still there, but just not as rich.




I once heard a theory:
A person who believes in God wins either way -
If there really is a God, he goes to Heaven.
If there isn't, he lived his life with purpose and died at peace.
But a person who doesn't believe in God loses either way -
If there really is a God, he's screwed (and he's missed the best things in life).
If there isn't, his life holds no deeper meaning anyway.

So which is better?
Regardless of the "answers" to life... what do we choose to believe in?
Our worldview largely shapes our reality.
And not to get too philosophical, I'd rather shape my reality by being conscious of my worldview, rather than throw punches into the darkness because I can't figure it out.




I also find it rather interestingly ironic that we usually find ourselves only when the greatest trial and tribulations in our lives present themselves. We lose ourselves when we are too complacent and too comfortable with who we "think" we are.


Guess having to counsel rich kids makes me think about stuff like that. :p